Aug. 29: Hello, I’m Carol Brady

Y’know what I think is so great about my blog? Every single entry is important, profound, and meaningful. I think that’s something to be proud of, don’t you? And so, this afternoon I bring one more Post o’ Pithiness.

My hair is weird.

I’ve always had a lot of hair with a little bit of natural wave in it. When I let it grow long it used to be straight because it’s very heavy, but cut chin-length it was usually a little wavy. Over the years the color has certainly changed—the older I got, the darker it got, and now it’s getting lighter because of the grey.

In 2005, my hair quite suddenly went curly. A few hair expert-types told me that extreme emotional distress can manifest itself in changes to hair—just like it can affect other parts of our systems—and said the grief over my dad’s death could very well have made my hair go all wonky. (This infuriates my straight-haired sister, who insists she misses Dad too but didn’t get anything “good” for her grief.)

I don’t know if losing my dad had anything to do with the new curliness of my hair, but the timing makes sense and nothing else really does. Some people have said, “Oh, that’s so sweet! It’s like a gift from your dad!” Those people don’t know that my dad hated when I wore my hair curly. When I was in high school he hated it so much, in fact, that he offered to pay me if I would get my perm cut off. I not only took the cash, I made him pay for the haircut at a fancy place and a complete line of salon hair care products too. He totally did.

So, if anything, my curls are just pissing Dad off as he views me from above (or below... there’s a good chance it’s from below...). And while I thought it was kinda cool at first, I often wish I had my old hair back. Adjusting to non-permed hair that insists on being curly all on its own has been a challenge. I’m not going to complain a whole bunch because—to some people—that would sound like bitching about having too much money or being too darn thin. In the past three years I’ve gone back and forth between living with the natural curl and fighting with the natural curl; it’s a ton of work to straighten when it’s long, but the curl is uneven enough that I have to use lots of product to get it to look alright if I let it go natural.

When I went in for a cut last month I asked for something that could enhance the curl. Now I can let my hair air-dry with a little gel and it ends up nicely shaped with fairly even curls. However—as I realized last week—if I blow-dry and straighten it... well, I have a freakin’ mullet.


And not to say there are good mullets, but this is an excessively bad one.

We’re stayin’ curly for a while, alrighty?


P.S. Yikes—I need a brow wax. Why does that fact show up so obviously on film and not where it should, in the mirror?
P.S.2. Dan, I always enjoy your great comments on my political posts. I’m challenging you to think up something insightful to say about this hair post. Good luck.