stuff jen says: Aug. 29: Month in Review

Here’s my review of August 2012.

Special days I celebrated this month and how:

No big-deal birthdays or holidays. August measures low on the celebrations scale in our family.
Katie registered for seventh grade.
PTO started moving full steam ahead-like this month. That’s cool (for now).

Gifts I gave and/or received this month:

PTO welcomed teachers back to school with special survival kits. They were so much fun to put together! We presented them yesterday at the Welcome Back lunch we serve every summer.

No, they aren’t 2-liter bottles of booze. They contain disposable toothbrushes, microwave popcorn, Alka-Seltzer, lip balm, Motrin, personalized note cards, ear plugs, lint rollers, mints, marbles (in case they lose theirs), energy bars, cough drops, and more silly things. How we got all the stuff in there is m-a-g-i-c. For realsies.

I tried to pack a little extra hate in a couple of the teachers’ bottles, but Theresa wouldn’t let me. Pfffftt. Theresa’s such a peace-keeper. She’s like Gandhi, if Gandhi was a wine-swigging, potty-mouthed, very pretty girl.

While searching the web for teacher gift ideas, I found this:

Books I read this month:

The Angel’s Game, by Carlos Ruiz Zafón. I thoroughly enjoyed this book--could hardly put it down--though I’m not entirely sure what happened. He said it was supposed to be up to our own imagination, but I must not have one because I was ever so confused!
Memoirs of a Geisha, by Arthur Golden. This glimpse into Japanese culture was completely fascinating.
The Memory Keeper's Daughter, by Kim Edwards. I did not enjoy this book. It was so sad and hopeless, and I hated the deceit from which the story was made. While it had the happiest ending it could have, it was still just a big bummer.

Movies and TV shows worth mentioning:

So glad that Grimm is back on TV.
The Olympics were great fun.
My laptop fan makes a terribly loud noise that makes me want to throw it against the wall. Playing PIXAR movies at high volume drowns out the noise. I kinda love it a lot.
I watched the first episode of the new Matthew Perry sit-com and it looks pretty funny. It’s Chandler-y sarcasm and wit--LOVE!

Special or unusual purchases I made:

It’s not every month I buy 18 lint rollers.
Jack got sport goggles for playing football. They’re funny. Don’t tell him I said that; to him, I said he looked totally awesome, like a real athlete.

This month’s disappointments:

Summer seemed awfully short.
Victor’s stoopid car is acting weird.
Jack had his first football injury--he hurt his foot. We thought it was broken at first because it was so swollen and tender, and Lucy stepping on it didn’t help. By the next day, though, he had no trouble putting weight on it. Whew.

My accomplishments:

PTO projects are coming along. Preparing for school to begin is a pretty big task, but I have enthusiastic helpers, thank buddha.

Anything else noteworthy:

I hate Express-Scripts so much. If they were a person I would make a voodoo doll and do despicable, fiery things to it.
I got interviewed by a newspaper about surviving cancer. More on that later.
I have funny pictures to share:

That’s it, doods.

facts of jen's life

So, who do you think you are? I think I’m Jen. People who don’t know me sometimes call me Jenny. That’s weird.

Tell me about yourself. I was born a small black child, and am now a grown-up, or at least my kids think I am. I’m in my mid-40s and live in the ‘burbs of Portland, Oregon. My husband is Victor, and my kids are Katie and Jack. Read this if you want the real and very long scoop.

Tell me things people might not know about you. I am an ordained minister and can perform marriages. Why no one has asked me to do this for them yet, I do not know. ● At the request of my Disney-hating friend Ed, I got mouse ears embroidered with the name “Satan” and I didn’t even get kicked out of Disneyland. It’s quite possibly the ballsiest thing I’ve ever done. ● I “helped” write this book, published in 2012: You Take it From Here, by Pamela Ribon. My name is in the back, and I’m still geeking out about it. ● I recorded a song in a studio in 1994 and it got local radio play for a few months. At least two times I turned on the radio in the car and my song was playing at that moment—very cool. ● I nearly died from a zit in 1986. I am not making this up. ● Victor and I once appeared on The Tonight Show. Really. If you can find a VCR, I’ll show you the tape.

I read some of your posts and I think you might be an alcoholic. I drink way less than I write about drinking. If I ever STOP talking about booze, then it’ll be time for an intervention.

What do you love? Books. Coffee. Fonts. Broadway musicals. San Francisco. Bacon. Rum. Law & Order. Naps. Butter. Home. Crack cocaine. iDevices. Words. Disney vacations. You.

If you could punch anything or anyone in the face, what/who would it be? Cancer. I was diagnosed with lymphoma in November 2009. I kicked its big fat ugly ass and am in remission now. ● Comic Sans. ● People who won’t take responsibility for their problems—the “I didn’t do anything to deserve this!” attitude. Look in the mirror. That’s who to blame. ● Celebrities who are famous for no reason. Y’know, if we stop looking, they’ll go away... ● Bad grammar and spelling and the dummies who use it.

You seem bitter. Did someone piss in your Cheerios? I’m not bitter. I think unicorns-and-rainbows stuff isn’t very interesting to read, so I tend not to write that way. But also, now you’re being kind of a jackhole.

It seems like no one ever comments on your blog posts. Why is that? Most people comment on the Facebook links. I don’t know why.

What if I want to tell you something? Two ways to reach me: leave a comment on a post, or e-mail me at jenniferTAKETHISPARTOUTmanullang at gmail-dot-com.

Aug. 29: Month in Review