Feb. 5: Daredevils in school

"Manly teachers make better role models"

This headline immediately infuriated me, but after reading the accompanying article, I think it was just a poor choice of headline; the article doesn't exactly support that statement. Still, aren't we a civilized society? I guess maybe New Zealand isn't; a grade school principal there says "male teachers are more daring." Whatever.

I take offense at this for several reasons.

1. I'm a teacher and I don't think I'm less effective because I'm female
   
2. Katie has a male teacher this year and although I think he's awesome, I don't think he's better because he's a dude
   
3. I hate stereotypes like this. Like, "white people can't dance" (though in my case it's true) and "Asians are smarty-pantses" (my husband is the most forgetful, absent-minded, non-technical guy I've ever known--though he is good at math... never mind)
   
4. Aren't copywriters supposed to catch blatantly sexist statements like the one in this headline and CORRECT them, not WRITE them???

I now step off my overly zealous soap box. I need to go write a non-daring lesson plan anyway.

Feb. 4: Sad day in history

My friend Debi makes fun of me for listening to The Carpenters in my car. It seems like every time she visits I've got one of their CDs playing, and she thinks I'm a dork because of it. (Note that she doesn't visit very often; I usually listen to NPR or Radio Disney or the non-Garfunkelly sound of silence but occasionally throw in a CD.)

Karen Carpenter's voice was as near perfection as humanly possible, in my opinion. I'll never forget an article by a music critic years ago that said something to the effect of "Saying you dislike The Carpenters is saying you dislike music itself."

Had she not died on this day in 1983, I wonder what she and her brother would be doing now. Would they have a show in Branson? Would they be a joke, a punch line? Would they have tried comeback after comeback, à la Barry Manilow, Tony Bennett, David Lee Roth, and all those other stars who've also had hip replacements? Could they have adapted their style to be more hip? I don't know. I do know that the world lost a beautiful thing 25 years ago.

I've got quite a bit of driving to do tomorrow. Guess what I'll be listening to?

Feb. 4: E-trade baby ad

Thank goddess for YouTube, or I might have had to actually watch the Super Bowl yesterday. Here's one of the commercials that made me LOL.

Feb. 2: Big day for Sean

Happy birthday to my oldest nephew, Sean, who turns 21 today. I cannot believe that kid is already 21. I also cannot believe my sister is old enough to have a kid who's 21. That's just so funny I might be laughing all day.

Over Christmas I introduced Sean to the deliciousness that is a Dew-Mi (Mountain Dew and Midori) and although his idea of proportions emptied the Midori bottle pretty quickly, I felt sorta proud to be contributing to the delinquency of a minor, much like his father did for me a few years ago. It was not such a proud moment, though, listening to Stephen beg Sean to make him a Dew-Mi. In fact, it was quite possibly the weirdest conversation I've ever heard between brothers.

"Sean, will you make me a Dew-Mi?"
"Make it yourself."
"Please? I don't know how." (This is soooo the excuse Kath uses to get me to make her things)
"It's Mountain Dew and that green stuff."
Stephen pauses, then looks sideways to make sure Auntie Zen is listening. "Sean, I will pay you twenty dollars to Dew-Mi."

Enjoy your legal drunkenness today, Sean. And avoid your brother.

Feb. 1: If only I could be gassy

I had a teeny little adorable blonde roommate in college that could burp the entire alphabet. I was envious of this, much to my mother's disgust. I could get to "G" or so before I felt like my stomach would explode. But Marilee would go all the way to "Z" and then pretty much burp an entire conversation. She was incredible. Much to my mother's additional disgust, I have not stopped trying to get through the whole alphabet.

Yes, I am repulsive.

This admission is really just my making-things-relevant way of introducing you to a fun time-waster of a blog, 5ives. Today's entry is Five names you can belch, all of which I have not yet tested. Maybe after my lunch settles.

Sigh. I miss Marilee.

Jan. 31: SB XLII preview, sorta

I'm no Pepsi fan, and the game of football is the suckiest suckfest of all suckfests that ever sucked. I do enjoy Super Bowl commercials, however. And I really ♥s me some Andy Samberg teamed up with Justin Timberlake...

Jan. 30: The actual "Gay Agenda"

If this doesn't scare you, I don't know what will.

I know that many of you have heard Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell and others speak of the "Homosexual Agenda," but no one has ever seen a copy of it. Well, I have finally obtained a copy directly from the Head Homosexual. It follows below:

6am: Gym

8am: Breakfast (oatmeal and egg whites)

9am: Hair appointment

10am: Shopping

12 noon: Brunch

2pm:

1. Assume complete control of the U.S. Federal, State and Local Governments as well as all other national governments
   
2. Recruit all straight youngsters to our debauched lifestyle
   
3. Destroy all healthy heterosexual marriages
   
4. Replace all school counselors in grades K-12 with agents of Colombian and Jamaican drug cartels
   
5. Establish planetary chain of "homo breeding gulags" where over-medicated imprisoned straight women are turned into artificially impregnated baby factories to produce prepubescent love slaves for our devotedly pederastic gay leadership
   
6. Bulldoze all houses of worship
   
7. Secure total control of the Internet and all mass media for the exclusive use of child pornographers

2:15pm: Get forty winks of beauty rest to prevent facial wrinkles from stress of world conquest

4pm: Cocktails

6pm: Light Dinner (soup, salad, Chardonnay)

8pm: Theater

11pm: Bed (du jour)?

(Source: all over the www)

Jan. 30: And then there were two

So, Edwards dropped out of the race today. I was sorta bummed, but either Clinton or Obama are okay with me so all is not lost. Both have acceptable coiffure (I was never sold on John's 'do).

I remember way back when Bill Clinton first ran for president that it seemed fairly obvious early in the race he would be elected. I think the country was ready for a change after 12 years of Reagan/Bush. And when that jackass G.W. ran, even though I certainly didn't want him to be president, the country appeared to want a more conservative guy in charge. I hated that Bush "won," but it wasn't a huge surprise. Now that he's proven to be a bigger jackass than anyone thought possible, it seems clear to me that we're ready to get a Democrat back in office. But maybe I'm delusional and/or totally biased. With all the talk of candidates and issues these days, it really is hard to stand back and get a feel for what the general population wants; it's easier to choose a side than be objective right now.

What do I think? How nice of you to ask! The social issues are a big deal to me. I do not want Roe v. Wade to be overturned. I don't understand why people are threatened by gay marriage. Same with stem cell research. Next important, for me, is the war. Our soldiers have done the job they were sent to do and it's time for them to come home. I side with Democratic goals for our environment.

Social security, welfare reform, healthcare, immigration, etc. are areas that I'm less decided upon. I definitely want to research these things further, and will be doing that over the next few months.

My friend Chris has assembled a chart, admittedly biased, of the major candidates and their positions on the big issues. Check it out. I also encourage you to take a stand visually by doing some shopping at Stamp and Shout.

I'm still hoping for this write-in:

They may be the only guys who definitely know how to pronounce "nuclear."

Jan. 29: The whole fam dam

The Manullang family went to have portraits done in late December. To get us all in the same country was a big feat, not to mention the same studio. This was an occasion worth celebrating. Here's the big family pic, which will go somewhere on the web site if I ever get around to updating our family pages. Click it for a big'n.



I want to give a shout-out for the photographer, Martha Bieker, of Fun Time Photography. She's done our kids' soccer team pictures the last few years but this was the first time we'd gone to her for family portraits. I was thoroughly impressed with her professionalism and hard work, and she's also a lovely person! When Darlene and I went back to see the proofs, Martha had them set up in a slide show projected onto the wall with delightful musical accompaniment. She had even popped popcorn for us. If you're in the Portland area and looking to have portraits done, I recommend you call Martha. She has a beautiful outdoor setting besides her indoor studio. She also has some of those tickle things to get you to smile. Y'know, just in case you're not feeling the love.

Jan. 28: Toodles, blech-drink

The headline caught my eye: "Say Goodbye to Postum."

Ah, Postum. What self-respecting SDA can say they never tried it? And what self-respecting human being can say they thought it was a suitable replacement for the sinful caffeine-laden coffee? A favorite of Adventists and Mormons (only), Kraft Foods says the popularity of Postum has declined and they're no longer producing it. Apparently since the announcement was made, people have been selling it on eBay for 20 times its purchase price (which, in my opinion, is about a bazillion times its actual value).

I don't know why a handful of people are upset. First of all, if you want coffee but can't take the caffeine, here's an idea: try decaf. Dur. Secondly, you can easily make your own Postum. This is my best guess at its contents:

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1 cup hot water
12 moldy teabags
4 cans cat food (any flavor)
1 Tbsp. Mrs. Butterworths
Dash black pepper
3 stickbugs
1 paper towel

Mix all ingredients in a food processor. Strain a little bit, and drink.

---

I guarantee you, it'll taste exactly like the real thing and no one will ever know the difference.

Goodbye, Postum, indeed. Good riddance.