Mar. 28: BFF/Little Sis Weekend haiku

A sisters retreat 
Food, drinks, laughs, and a tattoo
The perfect weekend

 

Five altogether
Meet at Lori’s giant house
It’s dark! Leave bread crumbs!

 

So many bathrooms
Still, Kathy’s stuff’s all over
Jen will model it

 

Pole dancers unite
In living room number three
Swing, you sexy babes!

 

Multi-purpose pole
Also gets dart off skylight
Lori! Please don’t fall!

 

Kathy stumbles, trips
“Damn new-fangled vent cover!”
Now she has a bruise

 

Big cardboard Hayden
“Put him in Brenda’s shower!”
No scream? Big letdown.

 

Margaritas flow
Machine can make so many
Keep ‘em coming, Kim

 

Kath’s up. “Gotta pee.
That was a floor squeak! It was!
Stop laughing, bitches.”

 

Noise in the bushes!
Larry’s telephoto lens?
We’ll put on a show

 

Brenda is pantsless
Kim and Kathy are mooning
Jen and Lori? Clothed.

 

Late Sunday morning
Tattoo time! Drop your pants, Kim
This won’t hurt a bit

 

Jen photographs Kim
(Specifically, her tanned bum)
Jen can’t help the tears

 

Green and pink ribbon
Honoring sister Kari
Brenda and Jen, too

 

Fun sisters’ weekend
So much love, laughter, friendship
Forever treasured.

 

I love you, girls. Thanks for such a great weekend! You are all amazing, strong, charming women, and I’m proud to call you mine. ♥

Feb. 22: Wear the ribbon

So, my sister got that ribbon tattoo a few weeks ago, remember? And we were all like, OMG, YOU’RE SO AWESOME, KATH! Except for Not-so-Loveliest Lori, who was all WAY TO MAKE ME LOOK BAD, NOW I HAVE TO HURT YOU OR AT LEAST SHORTSHEET YOUR BED WHEN YOU VISIT. We’re not sure why Lori turns to violence at times like that, but we’re gonna say it’s because cancer makes her THAT angry. And P.S., we’re a little scared of her too.

Brenda, Kari and I—whose three initials were part of Kathy’s tat—all felt honored beyond belief to be part of Kathy’s commitment to wearing the ribbon. Along with those who went through with the Brazilian bikini waxes, we’re definitely feelin’ the love. You guys are the best, really. And to those of you who don’t wear the ribbon or get your nethers waxed, we still think you’re mostly cool too.

Now Kim F’n is thinking about getting a tattoo similar to Kathy’s, and she wants the rest of us to get one with her. While still in the planning stages, we’ve already encountered some problems; first, we chemo gals can’t get tattooed while we’re in treatment, so we’ll have to be the hand-holders at the tattoo party. The other issue is that at least one tattooee apparently needs a permission slip from her mom, and that’s going to be impossible because her mom still hasn’t forgiven her for the other tattoo she has.

What we’re looking for, then, is anyone else who wants to wear the ribbon—Kim is gonna scoff at any more hand-holding offers; she wants other people to suffer WITH her. And we also need someone who can forge Mabel’s signature. Let us know if you’re in.

Feb. 7: The bar has been raised

My sister was on a top secret mission in Denver last night. Here’s how she spent most of her evening:

 

And here’s what she left that surprisingly clean place with, which likely sent her directly to a liquor store if she has any sense at all (and I know she does):

The girl is definitely wearing the ribbon! That’s green for lymphoma and pink for breast cancer, and the initials are for me, Brenda FM and Kari RO. Kath, I feel comfortable speaking for Brenda and Kari when I assure you that we all love you right back, possibly now more than ever!