Nov. 13: It’s Saturday

Life is still leaning toward “suckage,” but here and there I’ve been blessed with things that make me oh-so-happy. I’m glad to have something to write about that doesn’t involve me kvetching non-stop. You probably are too.

• One of my favorite authors, Armistead Maupin, was at Powell’s last night and I went to see/hear him. It was my third time to see him in Portland, and my second time to see him with my good friend Ed. I don’t get to see Ed nearly as often as I should (that would be approximately every minute of every day), and our last-minute plan to meet up for the reading made my day. Yay! Maupin’s newest book, Mary Ann in Autumn, is (basically) the eighth in the Tales of the City series, and as this is one of my favorite book series, I’m thrilled to have another one to read. If you’ve read the first six books, you know that Mary Ann goes from charming and likeable to a total bitch; I look forward to seeing where Armistead takes her in this book. I think it’ll be good.
• Today is Jack’s ninth birthday. How that kid got so old so fast, I don’t know. He was kind of a spaz today, and I had to keep reminding myself why I love him, because more than once, I wanted to send him outside to play in the traffic. He planned most of his birthday party this year, and although he originally asked for another rainbow cake, I talked him down to two layers/colors and he was happy. Whew.
• I’m pretty sure if we stopped talking about Kanye West that he’d go away. Who’s with me?
• We’re going to Sunriver next week. It’s been a long time since we’ve been anywhere, and I’m determined that this trip will be all relaxing and lovely. I can hardly wait.
• My back has been killing me the last couple weeks. I don’t have trouble sleeping (hooray for my new sleeping drugs), but the walking/standing/working stuff is sometimes unbearable. On top of that, I have the general achiness of the flu, but none of the other normal flu symptoms. Also, I’m supa-grouchy.
• I did the PTO’s taxes this week. We normally have a CPA do them, but I decided to try it this year, and I got them done all on my own, like a pro. I’m totally patting my own back, I know. It was actually a little bit fun. Because we’re a 501(c)(3), the forms were different than most I’ve worked with, and the information they asked for made it challenge-y. Yes, “challenge-y” is too a weird, Fancy Lori™.
• My PET/CT scan is Tuesday. Cross your fingers for me, please. We don’t want to see O.J. anymore. We don’t want to see him EVER AGAIN.

That’s enough for now.

Nov. 9: Drama llama

Sometimes it seems like I write about anything and everything that’s going on in the House of Manullang. I don’t. In fact, there are lots of times that most of my thoughts are best left unsaid, unwritten, and unshared. That’s what’s going on right now—life is too damn dramatic to go into the details. I’ll tell you what I hate about the drama:

• The drama. Nope, I’m not a fan. Never have been. I like the slow, even keel days. A high once in a while is alright, and the lows are expected to come sometimes. But the constant up-down-up-down just sucks.
• The lack of sleep.
• The panic attacks. I’ve had two in the past seven days; before that, it had been years.
• The guilt from drawing away from others and the suspicions it brings. I want to say “I’m okay,” but I’m really not.
• The inability to vent by writing. I don’t want to hurt certain people, incriminate others, or piss off even more. I know, I could write something that is not meant for publication. I should work on getting better about that. When I was a journaler, I did it all the time.

So, ‘scuse me while I figure some things out and possibly disappear from the blogosphere for a bit. I’m okay. Well, I’m so-so. I’ll be okay, I can promise you that.

Nov. 7: Still here

I’m fine, really. I haven’t written for a while because I’ve been busy and uninspired and tired and my brain is foggy from overuse. Stop laughing, it’s true. Here’s what I’ve been doing since I last wrote:

1. Decorated for Halloween (nothing like waiting until the last minute)
2. Took Jack for a long-overdue haircut
3. Went to the Shaws’ rockin’ Halloween party
4. Handed out candy to trick-or-treaters—my favorite part of Halloween
5. Went to two doctor appointments (by the way, I found a new primary care physician and I like her and best of all, I won’t ever have to see Dr. Jackass again!)
6. Ran errands with Sunshine and—oh look! There’s that yummy Thai restaurant! We better go! I mean, since we’re out already ‘n stuff…
7. Had chemo #17
8. Found out my blood pressure is scary-high
9. Got the new Amy Sedaris book
10. Voted (everyone I voted for won, jus’ sayin’)
11. PTO board meeting
12. Restaurant night fundraiser at the Ram—it rocked!
13. Took Jack to football practice
14. Made signs and posters and flyers, oh my!
15. Got medication for my blood pressure and it quickly went to a not-even-a-teensy-bit-scary zone. Whew.
16. Went to Divine for Caramel Apple frozen yogurt, where Val and Sunshine and I were tempted to abandon our unruly spawn
17. With my fellow board members, announced all the big Jogathon winners at Friday Morning Meeting—OMG, so much fun!
18. Made a bazillion Italian sodas for kids at school as prizes for Jogathon
19. Went to Jack’s football game, which his team won, which means that of all the teams that suck, they suck the least
20. Shopped for more Italian soda supplies, and knocked five bottles of club soda off my cart on my way out of the store, which then rolled across the parking lot. Embarrassing? Naaaaahhh.
21. Made more Italian sodas for kids at Movie Night at the school, where five bottles of club soda a-sploded when Victor opened them. It was not funny. It wasn’t.
22. Drank a delicious blueberry lemonade concoction that I can’t stop thinking about and kinda want to marry
23. Was reminded of my good luck in life to have such amazing, supportive, fun friends
24. Slept in. Aaaaahhh.

I think I deserve a day of do-nothing-ness. That day might just be today. TTFN.

Oct. 29: Surprises, secrets, and a little parental pride

We had parent-teacher conferences last night. They went pretty much like they have since Katie’s first one in kindergarten—both kids are doing fine, they meet or exceed all the important markers for their grade, they’re well-behaved and fun in class, blah blah blah. And Victor and I sit there—like always—stunned, because these two kids are pretty much little poo-heads at home all the live-long day. I know we’re not the only parents shocked that their kids are liked at school; at home we worry that they’ll never make friends if they continue on the path toward being total assholes, but apparently AWAY from home they’re delightful. Pffft.

(Note that I did not call my kids “assholes.” I simply said they’re on their way to being them. There’s a difference, and that is an important designation or I end up with CPS banging on my door.)

During Jack’s conference, his teacher said that after they dance every morning, they start their first assignment and Jack is always something something something I don’t remember anything else after she said they dance every morning. We were all WHAT? YOU DANCE IN CLASS? AND JACK DANCES? ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? She’s been teaching them the Charleston and the box step, they know how to walk like Egyptians, they do a big hair thing (Jack and Alec are the two long-haired boys who can do that one with the girls), and she’s secretly preparing them for a class performance at The Nutcracker. OMG. I remember little else about his conference, but I know I love this woman for making my kid do this. OMG, so much. OMG.

Katie’s conference had fewer surprises, but I adore her teacher as well. Maybe it’s just because it’s fifth grade and there’s, like, serious work being done or something, but it seems like Ms. Y has found a way to make everything they do FUN. Katie’s doing really well with writing and math (ding-dong! Asian stereotype calling!), and loves being in class every day. This makes me very happy to hear, as I remember fifth grade being one of my most challenging years of school.

When I started fifth grade, my parents had just separated and it was my first year in private (SDA) school. I knew some kids at my new school from church, but for the most part, everyone and everything I knew changed. There was one classroom per grade, and some of the classes had fewer than 20 kids. It was a small school. They didn’t have a TAG program, which I had been in at the public school, and I don’t know if my teacher was lazy or stupid or just didn’t have time, but she absolutely would NOT give extra work to kids who finished ahead of others. I remember completing my entire spelling workbook by the end of October. I caught on pretty quickly that if you didn’t learn at the same speed of the others, you needed to slow down. I have often wondered if things would have been different if I hadn’t had that evil teacher in an already difficult year.

I won’t go into all the things that made her so horrible, but I know I made it obvious that I had no respect for her. She hated that, and told my mom in the fall parent-teacher conference that I frequently rolled my eyes when she would speak. I got in big trouble for that—Mom lectured me the whole way home on how I needed to respect authority even when I didn’t agree with what they were doing. I bet she was thinking to herself that I was exactly like my father.

I’m pretty sure I wasn’t so brilliant at that age that I knew my teacher was worthless, but I certainly knew I didn’t like her. I’m also pretty sure that my kids’ evil detectors are fully functioning, and that we’ve been fortunate they’ve had wonderful teachers so far. I’m totally crossing my fingers that our luck continues.

In the  meantime, I’m gonna keep the secret that I know Jack dances every day. It might be my favoritest secret ever.

Oct. 27: Can I interest you in Hanukkah?

Seems like I spent most of last weekend looking for Christmas music for our annual Christmas CD. I found a few gems (who knew Soupy Sales did a Christmas album?), but mostly I just started to hate Christmas. This CD is so dang much work. See what I do for you? And how much I must love you to go through all this? Yes, I’m a saint. That’s the word you were looking for: saint.

Here’s one of the gems that won’t be going on our Christmas CD, but only because it’s a live recording, not because it’s a Hanukkah song. Best part: it’s Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart. Pure awesomeness, right there.

Download this MP3 - (Right Click)

Oct. 26: School photos, 2010-11

I finally got around to scanning these. Maybe some day I’ll even send them out.

 
Katie, 5th grade ~ Jack, 3rd grade (don’t worry; you’re not the only one questioning the pink background)

 

This is still my favorite picture of Jack, though:

Oct. 26: The candy pyramid

With Halloween approaching, you’re probably needing some advice before you go shopping for the candy you’ll hand out to trick-or-treaters. It says so much about the family you are, doesn’t it? No? Maybe?

Here’s a helpful chart of candy hierarchy from boingboing.net:

The footnotes:

1. Note that many candies still await placement: York Peppermint Patties, Luna Bars, Reese's Pieces, residue from old paint cans, and Skittles, among others.

2. These may be rolled to a friend.

3. Whoppers blow.

4. Still no unanimous decision on the placement of Candy Corn, which as of 2006 remained unclassified, but as of 2007 had been tentatively placed in the Upper Chewy/Upper Devonian. 2008: no sighting.

5. Unless it's something caramel, pronounced "caramel."

6. Remains an outlier, since it is in no way "chewy." Further studies have not resolved this inconsistency.

7. Yet some would be just as well to be left off. Bit-o-Honey, for example, might be called a lower tier member, but why bother? It says to your trick-or-treaters, "Here, I don't care, just take this." The lesson of Bit-o-Honey is: you lose. Goo Goo clusters, too. You're making a social statement--"I hate you and everything you represent"--when you give these out.

As you can imagine, not everyone agrees with this hierarchy. The comments to this post are pretty good. These are my comments (because I know you were waiting, dying to know what I think):

• The only reason I would ever eat a Twix is if I was doing the whole George-slowly-going-insane routine from The Dealership episode of Seinfeld. Not a fan of Twix, or really any candy bar with the cookie crunch.
• Reggie Jackson bar? WTF?
• Whoppers do blow.
• Jolly Ranchers in the third tier? Unless they’re green apple or FIRE, they’re trash.
• Almond Joys should be higher than third tier. And they’re totally healthy because there’s fruit in them. AND there’s a nut. Health food.
• A lot of the candy in the bottom tier is stuff I like—non-messy, non-melting treats to eat while I’m at my desk. Smarties are perfect for that. I won’t argue for any of those to go up in the hierarchy, though—I know they’re “meh” compared to the good stuff.
• Debi and I decided long ago that “those odd marshmallow circus peanut things” are what they serve for every dessert on the Wal-Mart cruise line.
• Now ‘n Laters on the lowest tier? That’s funny. I used to love them, but nowadays I really only like a couple flavors. They’re also really bad for expensive dental work. They probably belong that low on the list.

When I took Katie trick-or-treating on our street for her second Halloween, a guy at one house was chuckling at how she so obviously did NOT understand the concept. I said it was better than the big kids, who T-o-T with pillowcases and don’t even bother to dress up. The guy said, “Oh, that’s why I have these!” and he showed me a bowl behind the door that was full of really crappy bubble gum—not Bazooka or a brand anyone’s ever heard of; it was truly nasty stuff. I thought that was a great idea, and I’ve had a small bowl of that stuff next to the good candy every year since.

Oct. 25: Daybook

Today…

Outside my window... it was blustery and rainy and depressing. This is my least favorite kind of weather.

I am thinking... about all the things I need to get done this week, Christmas lists, what’s for dinner…

I am thankful for... good friends who live nearby. We had tons o’ fun a couple of streets away on Saturday night, even though it rained and I was frozen solid by the time I made myself go home.

I am working on... our Christmas CD. Christmas music is hard!

I am going... to work (for pay) tomorrow, and volunteer at the school’s book fair around lunchtime. I love the book fair. The book fair is fun and gets kids excited about reading. Book fair = good.

I am reading... a lot of stuff on the Internet about some new drugs I’m trying out. Scary.

I am hoping... that I don’t get some of the side effects, ‘specially the painful erection. Ow.

I am hearing... Victor emptying the dishwasher. He’s noisy, but since he empties the dishwasher I let it go. I’m quite generous that way.

Around the house... there are tiny pieces of all the things the puppy has been chewing. When he gets tired of chewing bark and twigs and paper, he goes for socks, underwear, and towels. This morning he got hold of my nasal spray—he oughta have clear sinuses for a good long time now.

One of my favorite things... is when I wake up and find all three dogs and the cat on the bed with me. Throw in a few chickens and I could be one of the Beverly Hillbillies.

Plans for the rest of the week: everything. I’m doing absolutely everything this week. Leave me alone.

Here’s a photo I want to share:

I just think it’s pretty.

Want to blog your own Daybook? Here’s the info: The Simple Woman’s Daybook.

Oct. 22: IDCEAYWTPFriday

It’s Friday, and that means you get a post called I Don’t Care Enough About You to Write in Transitioning Paragraphs Friday.

• This week was full. Appointments and projects and meetings and responsibility kept most the fun away. I don’t like weeks like that. The highlight of the week might have been lunch with Sunshine on Monday—love that L-15 at the Thai place.
• My friend Kim F’n kills a lot of things.
• I’m trying out a new medication to help me sleep. It’s also supposed to help me want to scream at people less. So far the sleep part is definitely working; I can’t remember a thing about last night. I hope I wasn’t doing goofy stuff online or dancing down my street all nekkid. Gah. Either way, getting a good night’s rest makes me want to scream at people less, so, y’know, WIN-WIN-WIN.
• A little Ambien story for ya: One of my friends—who I won’t name just in case she prefers me not to tell the world—was taking Ambien and posted a bunch of stuff on Facebook one night while under the influence. I saw her posts and they seemed a bit unlike her, but I thought she was just being silly. Apparently it was her little Ambien elves at work, though, and her husband told her to delete all the posts the next morning. Funny, right? But it gets better! Another morning she woke up and all the hummus that had been in the fridge the night before was gone. If you don’t think you can eat a family-size  bowl of hummus on your own, set up a camera and take an Ambien. (My doctor offered Ambien, but I opted for a different kind of drug… I don’t trust myself in my coherent (cough cough!) state; I certainly can’t handle the idea of little elves helping me make my way through the Internet. They could make my blog a lot more interesting, though. Hm…)
• OMG, that was totally one paragraph that transitioned into another. I apologize.
• Last night Millie brought in a mouse. She does this once every couple weeks or so. While I do not like having mice in my house, it doesn’t freak me out to see them and don’t tell Loveliest Lori because it’ll make her make THAT face, but I even think they’re super-cute. Last night the mouse was still alive, but injured and not moving all that well. In fact, it was pretty much doing this:
  
  
  
  It made me laugh, kind of a lot.
  
  I wanted to put the mouse out of its misery, but most of all I wanted it out of my house. Where’s Kim F’n when I need her? I didn’t have a glove handy, so I grabbed saran wrap and picked the mouse up to throw it outside. I should have picked it up by the tail, yes, but I didn’t think that part through, and instead grabbed his body, and guess what? That friggin’ little mouse BIT me! My first thought was RABIES! and then my weakened immune system, and OMG, the places my brain went from there… yikes. I quickly got on the Internet and found out how to treat mouse bites. Apparently, there is no known case of a human contracting rabies from a mouse EVER, and even the hantavirus is extremely rare. I cleaned the bite well, and now we’re hoping I’m not the first known case of a human contracting rabies from a mouse EVER.
  
  Also, I read all that stuff on Wikipedia, so I know it’s gotta be true.
• I think it’s cool when people make non-food things out of food. Those fondant cakes that look like purses? Awesome. The mashed potatoes made into Taj Mahal? Well, kinda weird, but mashed potatoes are still mashed potatoes. Yummy Taj Mahal! Anyway, I also like cute little goodies, and I’ve been a fan of fun Halloween treats ever since my mother-in-law made candy sushi for one of our parties a few years back. I had fun with this candy corn cheesecake dessert last year. Here are a couple things I ran across today that I just have to share (click the photo to go to the how-to for each item):

What’s cool about this one is the surprise inside…

 

This isn’t a Halloween thing, but I think it kinda rocks

• Have I mentioned lately how much unnecessary capitalization and inappropriately-used apostrophes make me want to kill people? The other day I texted Val “your welcome,” knowing she would get that the lack of apostrophe was intentional, and it physically hurt me to tap “send.” Ouchie. Anyway, my point is that gross misuse of punctuation should be a felony. Pretty sure. And I should get to decide the punishment. (Hint: it’ll always, always, always be DEATH.)
• The mouse thing happened last night during Community, so I missed several minutes of it and then the rest of the episode made no sense. I hate that. We couldn’t pause the show because we still haven’t replaced our TiVo that died. Grrr, us. Victor and I got to talking about the convenience of Hulu and then got to thinking… what if we cancelled cable TV and watched TV online only? It’d save us a ton of $$, and just about everything is online these days. Down sides? Help us decide, please.
• I think we’ll try to go to the pumpkin patch this weekend. The weather’s supposed to be crappy and even though it’s been nice all this week, I like to wait until there’s mud up to our knees so we can get it all over the inside of our cars. Mm-hm. This is the jack-o-lantern The Boy wants to do this year, which I absolutely love:

• You know what I’ve hardly even thought about this year? Our annual Christmas CD. I need to get working on that thing. I think I chose most of the songs last year, but I need to make sure I can get my hands on all of them, and then I need to slowly go insane while I plan the sequence and design and list of recipients. Why do I do this to myself? WHY??? Oh, yes… it’s because some of you love our Christmas CD. I can’t disappoint you three peoples.
• The Tom Jones thing on 30 Rock last night made me LMAO. The perm! “The bus, I mean hotel room.” Love that show.

Wow, the day’s halfway over. When ya sleep until 10 a.m., that happens pretty fast. Go me!

Oct. 19: Love letter to the world

This love letter to the world is a free PDF download from Your Courageous Life. It’s a bit idealistic, but I kinda love it anyway. When I imagine my best self, I like the idea of it including the patience to walk in someone else’s shoes. (Or steal them, if they’re really cute.)