Apr. 29: Put your camera where your mouth is

You know how much we hate cancer ‘round here, right? I desperately need help with this fight, and if you’re wondering what you can do, here’s a reminder:

send me a picture of you dancing around a pole or pole-like object!

I’ve collected photos of friends dancing around legs of dangerous wild animals, bristlecone pine trees (ouch, brave Dana!), playground equipment, rifles, and actual IV poles (which is how this all started, thanks to Kim F’n), among other unusual items. It doesn’t matter what it is. It also doesn’t necessarily have to be YOU in the photo—it can be your pets or your kids or your one-legged nana if you’ve got one. It doesn’t even matter if I’ve never met you personally, because this is the thing:

if you hate cancer, I want proof!

Here’s an IV pole dancing picture I took of Kathy at Chemo #8 the other day and forgot to include in my post. See, I have a folder in which I’ve been storing all of your pole dancing photos, and for some reason I filed that one away immediately. Silly me. I started to text-scream at Kathy this morning for not emailing it with the other pictures from that day, after all I’ve done for her or somethin’ like that to make her feel guilty, and then I thought to check my Pole Dancers Extraordinaire! folder. There it was. And here it is:

See how much fun she’s having? Wouldn’t you like to try it out and see how much fun pole dancing can be for you as well? Hey, if I’ve got Adventist pastors sending me pole dancing photos of themselves, I think you can play along too.

Remember, you don’t need an actual IV pole; it only has to be something on which you can wrap your leg around. Sparkles are good too. And sure, I’ll give you extra points for creativity, but mostly I just want to see that you hate cancer. Trust me, pole dancing is waaaay less painful and less awkward and less embarrassing and less humbling than getting a Brazilian bikini wax and/or a tattoo, according to y’all who’ve gotten one, plus you won’t have to get on all fours (unless you really, really want to, in which case it’d be best for your photo to arrive in a brown paper wrapper, thanks).

If certain people don’t take me seriously about this request, I may just enlist the help of Kim F’n to strong-arm you into posing and you do NOT want that girl after you. She can carry a refrigerator under each arm, or so the legend goes.

Email your full-resolution photos to jennifer-at-manullang-dot-com. Eventually I will put my collection in an awesome collage à la this one. Right now I have the photo below selected to be the collage centerpiece. It’s a variation on pole dancing that surely makes parents everywhere proud as can be:

I was given permission to post this, um, “pole dancing” photo, but I’m quite sure this departure from the more traditional style of pole dancing is exactly why many of my friends’ husbands have forbidden them to send me pictures. Please assure any extra-cautious spouses that pole dancing does not have to be naughty, although Kathy might argue that it’s more fun if it is. She’s probably right.

Don’t make us assume you love cancer. You don’t love cancer, do you???

Thanks.