Kate Spade, designer of fabulous handbags, has expanded her line in recent years to include shoes, home décor, eyeglasses, and many more desirable items. There are few things she’s done that I don’t completely and totally covet as my own.
These new little sandal-y things are, for me, her only true question mark thus far. At first glance they’re adorably girly and I love the big jewel type of thing on the strap, like jewelry for my piggies. But then I look closer and see that these are freakin’ jelly shoes. Like the jelly shoes I wore in high school. The ones that made my feet smell like old French fries. You know what I’m talking about. Jellies.
And because they’re transparent, you can see what the bottoms of the shoes look like. Oooh, traction! At least, I hope those ridges are on the bottom of the shoes. If they’re on the foot bed I think they would hurt my balls. (The balls on my feet, of course. I don’t have the other kind of balls. But if my feet are sore, I do like saying “My balls hurt!” when walking around in public. It’s fun. Try it sometime.)
Besides possibly being uncomfortable, these jellies are $60. That seems steep. They’re designer shoes, I know, but they’re still the freakin’ jelly shoes I wore in high school. Have you already forgotten that part?
Opinions, please. On the shoes, not the inappropriate public outbursts.
Thank you.
But all I wanted to say was that yes, many could mistake you for a very good drag queen if you complain about your balls in public.
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