It was an Olympics weekend at our house. That is to say, we sat on our arses and watched young, athletic people do what we cannot. Here are my thoughts so far about the summer games:
- Vancouver would be wise not to try to top Beijing’s opening ceremonies. Because did you see them?
- How do the American athletes not bawl their heads off when they play our anthem? (Or am I the only one?)
- Women’s beach volleyball is only an Olympic sport to get more viewers. Not complaining, just stating the obvious.
- Here’s one of the few pictures of Dubya that makes me laugh and not cringe.
They said he’s the first sitting U.S. president to attend a beach volleyball competition at the Olympics—shocking that Clinton never fit that event into his busy pants-dropping schedule, eh?
- Speaking of good uniforms, the only guys in the entire world who look decent in Speedos? They’re wearing pants or bodysuits. I call shenanigans.
- Handball? Trampoline? Badminton? Table tennis? Wuh-huh? When did stupid time-wasters you play in your driveway or front yard become competitive? I didn’t realize there were even real rules to some of these, much less competitive standards. Sorta explains how synchronized swimming still exists as an Olympic sport, I guess.
- Sometimes I wish Bob Costas would shut the hell up. Really, Bob. Shut it.
The U.S. is in first place in the Olympics medal count, but China has more golds than we do. Which brings to mind one of my favorite quotes from The Simpsons:
“People, people, please, you are forgetting what the Olympics are all about: giving out medals of beautiful gold, so-so silver, and shameful bronze.”