May 7: I think that I shall never see...

Here are just a few of the things I hope are never written before my name, before or after I die:

  • murderer (alleged, convicted, suspected, fugitive, or otherwise)
  • Pontiac Aztec-owner
  • swinger
  • Doodlebop
  • terrorist
  • Southern Baptist
  • Poodle Club of America member
  • odoriferous
  • model prisoner
  • habitually post-operative transsexual
  • racist
  • celebutante
  • Republican
  • leper
  • defendant
  • accidental porn star
  • Fatty Fatty Boombalatty

And things I'd love to see before my name someday:

  • gazillionaire philanthropist
  • supermodel
  • Saint (or Messiah... that'd be OK too)
  • ancient and revered Jedi Master
  • bobble-head doll
  • heiress
  • Mother (or Sister, Wife, Daughter, Friend, Neighbor, etc.) of the Year
  • henchwoman
  • largest jackpot winner in lottery history
  • heroine
  • cartoon character
  • best-selling author
  • mega-rock stars Sean & Steve Voss' aunt
  • Olympic gold medal winner in napping
  • Texas Hold 'Em champ
  • world traveler
  • TIME traveler!

What about you?

1 comment:

  1. Ah, c'mon, we all know you want to have that "Murderer" title...

    ReplyDelete

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