Nov. 4: Pa-too-ee

Long before I ever had children of my own, I vowed I would never use my own saliva to clean their faces. My mom did this to me and Kathy all the time (well, it seemed like she did) and we hated it. And when we told her we would never do it to our own kids, she laughed and insisted that once we became moms, we would. "Every mom does." She could not have been more wrong. I can't speak for my sister, but I have never cleaned my kids with my spit. Their spit, yes. But mine? No way.

If the thought of spitting on your children disgusts you like it does me, you might be interested in this product, MomSpit™. It's supposedly sanitary.

Because this product does not appeal to me in the least (could it be the name???), I'll stick to the baby butt wipes I keep in my car, thankyouverymuch. There are plenty of other ways I'm sure to screw up my kids; this is not going to be one of them.


  1. Now I'm curious to know how this has screwed you up--using my own DNA (which, by the way, has a surprisingly good familial match with yours) to attack dirt, ice cream and other food dribblings? I need to know your answer so that I can discuss it in my upcoming autobiography, How I Screwed Up My Children and They Still Came Out Geniuses.

  2. Not only have I used my own spittle to clean my son's faces, I think I used it to clean YOURS a time or two, Jen! Before the days when baby wipes were available at every checkout, we had to use the only tools we had.


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