May 18: Chemo #9

I started the “new” chemotherapy regimen today. As I mentioned last week, I’m now doing only the ‘R’ of my original CHOP-R regimen, which I completed three weeks ago. Rituximab (aka Rituxan, MabThera) is a targeted therapy and the idea is that continuing it for six months will kill the rest of OJ and, most importantly, keep him from coming back.

Today I decided that I don’t like this chemo regimen any more than the other. Here’s why:

• When I was on CHOP-R, I started the process by getting the IV, then getting very small injections of Ativan and Aloxi (for nausea) and oral Benadryl (for possible allergic reactions) and Tylenol (for fun, I guess). The majority of the time was spent getting either C, H, O, or R. The ‘P’—prednisone—was oral and taken for the four days after chemo.
  
  With ‘R’ now, I start with Tylenol and then get small IV bags of Benadryl, Pepcid (why?), and Decadron, which is a steroid and makes me think of ‘dodecahedron’—a very fun word to say and something I never really understood about geometry because a 12-sided polyhedron? What is that???
  
  Anyway.
  
  Then they start the Rituximab. It goes through an IV pump and it. is. molasses.
  
  (It’s not really molasses. I hope.)
  
  For me, the very slow process of this new regimen means that my time in the chemo chair is no shorter than before. That sucks. I really hate it.
• And that Decadron? Another steroid? Why? I hope it doesn’t do to me what prednisone did to me. Decadron’s side effects are similar to Rituximab’s, so that’s another pisser. The idea of feeling for the next six months the way I’ve been feeling for the past five months does not appeal to me in the least. Don’t be surprised if I start complaining about it.
• (I know, I know. I complain about everything. You won’t be surprised at all.)
• I asked my Facebook friends today what I should call this chemo thing now that it’s not a full chemo regimen, but a partial one. And is it #9, or is it #1? I got some very good suggestions, but after going through it today, I think this new process is not very different from the previous eight treatments. This makes me cranky cranky cranky.
• Today was the first time I’ve ever gone to chemo by myself. I figured since I wouldn’t be there very long, it wasn’t worth Victor taking the whole day off work. I also didn’t invite anyone else along, and that was stupid of me. I enjoyed blocking out the noise of the room with my ear buds and the “Rent” soundtrack, but it got old. I was bored. I was so bored I even chatted with Crazy Hat Lady. She’s very sweet but she’s, like, 350 years old and I have enough elderly folk in my life.
• Vic came by on his lunch hour and did a quick run for vittles. We smelled up the infusion room with our Taco Bell food (aromatherapy!), AND we got to have lunch together. Win-win for us. Not so much for the other patients.
• Some guy’s daughter brought in really good frosted shortbread cookies today. Crazy Hat Lady made a cake. Those things made me happy. Then the guy who shared the cookies fell asleep and snored up the whole room, and Crazy Hat Lady wouldn’t shut up about her damn cake. I really wanted to not be there anymore.
• Anyone want to be my chemo date on June 8 or June 29? Otherwise I will be lonely and sad.

I’m trying to keep a good attitude about the next six months of my treatment, but it’s frustrating. I’m tired of going through this every three weeks and feeling crappy right up until it’s time to start all over again. I’m just tired.