May 17: Baldness, baby vs. adult

This morning I found these old baby pictures. They were taken at a stage in my life when bald was an okay way to go. Time for some compare and contrast, don’t you think? I think. I do. Here goes.

This picture was taken February 6, 1969 and I have no idea why that date was significant enough for my mom to write it on the back. Kathy (on the left, glaring) was 4½ years old; I was 4½ months old.

I went through all 184 of the extreme baldness shots from a couple weeks ago to find a similar angle to my pose above. It took a lot of work to get the newer photo grainy and kinda blurry, and as much as I tried to make it look like the crappy photography from the 60’s, I just don’t have the skillz or motivation. As you can see, I have that same huge forehead and overall roundness in both pictures, and that’s the point of this whole stupid example. I just gotta say this: baldness was much cuter at 4½ months than it is at 41½ years, though. Sad face.

      

This next photo was taken at the same place (note that snazzy wallpaper again) on March 4—my dad’s 27th birthday. See his pipe in the ashtray in front of him? I’m kinda surprised he put it down for a few minutes to unwrap his gifts. I was 5½ months old here. I think the other kids are Daniel, Kathy and Rhonda. The white spots on Dad’s tie, the gift, and coming out of his forehead are parts of the photo that bubbled off. (What, doesn’t everyone store precious family photos on their stove?)

Y’know what bugs me about this picture? I totally have hair! That ain’t a shadow, that’s real hair! So I’m balder now than I was at 5½ months old. That is so not funny.

Again, I tried to make the photo grainy and blurry and torn, like the original. Not even close. Oh well.

  

In both pictures, the amount of space between the top of my ear and the top of my head is way off compared to the space between the bottom of my ear and my jawline. Aren’t ears supposed to be on the side of one’s head, not on one’s neck?

I’m friggin’ FRANKENSTEIN.