Sep. 29: Such a bitch

Casey, our rat terrier, showed up at our front door about three years ago. She was easy to love because she’s an affectionate little girl. Well, she’s affectionate toward people. Not so much toward other critters. She does not like Scout. She pouts when Millie gets attention. She charges other dogs when we go out walking. You might say she’s a bitch... in every sense of the word.

Whoever owned her for the first ten years of her life took good care of her, probably didn’t have any other pets, and taught her some tricks. Even after three years, we’re still discovering some of the commands she knows. Do I have an example? You bet your vestigial tail I do.

Yesterday I was stretched out on the bed reading and both dogs were curled up with me, as they usually are when I’m stretched out on the bed. Vic came in after a bit and sat next to me, so Casey immediately claimed the space between us. Millie wandered in and lay down at the foot of the bed. Casey glared and growled but stayed where she was. We started baby-talking to her (annoying as hell, I know, but she loves it so much her whole body wiggles; trust me, it’s very cute). You know how they say dogs supposedly just understand your tone, not the words you say (i.e., “blah blah blah Ginger blah blah”)? This is sorta how it went:

Casey, you’re such a good girl!
You don’t want to eat Millie, do you?
You’re a good doggie and you know Millie’s a little kitty, right?
You need to be nice to Millie!
Will you let her cuddle with you?
No?
You hate Millie, huh?
You want to bite the kitty, don’t you?
You can’t do that. We won’t let you, no matter how good you are.
But you’re a sweet girl, aren’t you? Yes, you are!
Such a sweet girl.
Oh fine, you go right on ahead. Bite the kitty.

Suddenly she lunged across the bed at Millie. We grabbed her before any damage was done. And that was the end of the baby talk.

She surprised us with “beg!” and “roll over!” We figured out if you say “You get ‘im!” she’ll bark ferociously. Now we’ve learned she apparently knows “bite the kitty!” too. Yikes. Let’s not mention this to Jack, mmmkay?

Full of surprises, this dog.