Jun. 9: Dream analysis

My blog is quickly turning into a never-ending bitch session. I apologize, really. Nobody wants it to NOT be that more than I do. Believe it or not, I actually don’t share all the pain and anguish I endure in my daily life—not because I don’t want to tell y’all about it, but because I’m embarrassed how much of it is a result of my extreme clumsiness. So it ends up, at times like these, that I seem to be bitch-bitch-bitching even when I don’t want to be. The thing is, I’m really not unhappy. I mean, having that headache really sucked, but I’m mostly over it now and that’s really, really, super-duper good. Really. And not having a headache makes me happy. Really.

What does not really make me happy is that I’m having to sleep sitting straight up on the couch again because my back is not yet finished telling me how much it hates me. Much like my grandmother, just when the pain seems to have disappeared and I’m feeling good again, it writes me a letter on the back of a letter I sent her that’s full of accusations of what a bad granddaughter I am.

Or maybe a better analogy than that one.

The weird thing is that I’ve kind of gotten used to sleeping on the couch in that weird position and it’s not as bad as it used to be. In fact, I even napped like that this afternoon. I’ve got an ottoman, a down comforter, many pillows, a heating pad, and at least one cuddly pup with me. I shouldn’t be as thrilled as I am about the bonus of NOT having a snoring beast next to me, but here’s a not-so-secret: I sorta like it. However, I miss my bed. I like my bed. My bed is a good bed.

My back doesn’t hurt very much when I’m moving around; it’s just when I lay down that it screams bloody murder. If I haven’t tried to lay down for a while, I easily forget that I need to take it easy and start, say, reorganizing the garage… lifting large, heavy boxes over my head… moving lawn machinery that weighs more than I do… I’m never going to get better if I keep forgetting I need to get better.

I started writing about my nap but thought I should first explain why I was sleeping sitting straight up on the couch, and then realized that I’ve been complaining an awful lot lately and that sent me off on the above tangent. But what I actually wanted to say is this: during my nap today I had a dream that I was blogging. Yes. I had taken my laptop to Disneyland and was sitting in a restaurant lobby, blogging. I have thoroughly analyzed this dream and decided it means at least one of the following things:

• I blog too much so I dream about it
• I don’t blog enough so I dream about it
• I need to go to Disneyland
• If I was a true friend, I’d refer you to some blogs that have actual substance, or at least pictures of yummy mushrooms. ‘Cuz you really should spend your time better than you do when you’re here.

I’m tired and I’m going to couch.