Jen E of Momma Blogs a Lot participates in a meme called Aloha Friday every week. She does a lot of weekly write-ups, which I admire because I have a hard time sticking with them. They feel too assignment-y, I think. But this week I decided to participate along with her because:
- It’s 1 a.m. Friday night (Saturday morning, actually) and I can’t sleep
- I like the question and have strong feelings about my answer
The idea of Aloha Friday (according to its originator at An Island Life) is that you think up your own question and post it to your blog. I guess I’m really not following rules today, because I’m answering Jen E’s question AND I’m making Aloha Friday into Aloha Saturday. Oh well. Here’s the question Jen E posted for Aloha Friday:
Do you live close to your parents/extended family? How do you feel about your proximity to them?
There are 1.8 miles between our house and Victor’s parents’ and I love that we live that close to them. There have been times when I’m stuck in traffic in Portland when I’m supposed to be meeting K&J getting off the school bus; I’ve been able to call Darlene and she races off to meet them for me. 
She occasionally stops by on her way home from Costco to temporarily store things in the freezer in our garage. If K&J are staying overnight at their house, which they frequently do, and forget something, which they frequently do, it’s no big deal to run it by. (Don’t tell K&J that part. Thanks.)
When Darlene and Wellington moved from Seattle a few years ago, they were looking to live in the Vancouver area, which is about 28 miles and 35 minutes (minimum) north of us. I got sneaky; I found some places in the Clackamas area and slipped the flyers in with other homes they were planning to see with their realtor. There was one home in particular that had an amazing newly remodeled kitchen that I knew Darlene would love. She did; they bought that house that very day!
Honestly, I think they could live next door to us and I’d be alright with that. They’re not obnoxious or intrusive and I don’t think I’ve ever felt that they’ve crossed boundaries with us.
My mom moved from Walla Walla to Medford nearly two years ago. It was a very long four hours’ drive to WW, and it’s between four and five to Medford, but it’s all interstate between here and Medford and that makes a huge difference. An even bigger difference is that Mom is no longer married to that one jackass, so we don’t have to put up with him on every visit.
Sadly, my grandmother moved to Medford when my mom did. She has her own place, but I still have to see her when I’m in town. You might call ours a hate-hate relationship. However, I often get to see my uncle and other extended family members so, to paraphrase Newman: “I’ll take a little bit of Grandma if it gets me a lot of everyone else.”
Anyway, while I wish my mom was closer geographically, I talk to her almost every day and we tend to see each other every 4-6 weeks or so. That definitely makes the distance manageable. However, like D&W, she’s not a boundary-crosser either, so if Mom lived next door I think I’d be good with that.
My dad lived in the Cooper Mountain area (on the other side of Portland) for the 10 years before he died. I think that was a good distance from us. He was close enough that we could get together pretty much whenever we wanted, but not so close that he ever did the pop-in. Dad was not a pop-in kind of guy anyway. The only times it was really frustrating to have him 40 minutes away was when K&J were infants and would fall asleep during the drive across town and totally screw up their nap schedules.
The family member that’s farthest away from me geographically is my sister, who’s in Colorado. I’m hoping that will change soon. She and Ron are too busy being jet-setting empty-nesters right now though, lucky ducks.
Of course, the rest of Victor’s family is (literally) spread all over the world. Ted’s in Seattle, Daryl is in Rhode Island, Sonya’s in Shenzhen, China. The extended Manullang family is also all over the world, with a large concentration of them in southern California. We definitely wish the siblings weren’t so far away; the others are fine where they are.
Your turn… feel free to answer on your own blog or in a comment.
While I love living in Medford, and at some level believe it was a good choice, I do wish I were closer to you, Jen, and Kathy, as well. I have a very frustrating relationship with my mother, but I know it's important to be near to her. And, of course, I love being close to my brother and Claire! Any chance of your getting down during Spring Break????
ReplyDeleteWhile I love living in Medford, and at some level believe it was a good choice, I do wish I were closer to you, Jen, and Kathy, as well. I have a very frustrating relationship with my mother, but I know it's important to be near to her. And, of course, I love being close to my brother and Claire! Any chance of your getting down during Spring Break????
ReplyDelete