Sep. 27: How'd I get here?

There's software plugged into Blogger that gives me site statistics. When I look at them, I get super happy to see how many hits my site gets. But then I look closer and see that for most visits, the average time on the site is 0:00:00. This means someone clicks on a link to get here and then sees nothing of interest and leaves immediately. I have special words for those people. They are words like, "Oh, so you think you're too good for me? You think I'm a bore? You have better things to do with your time than read what I write?" And then I sit in the dark and cry for an hour or two.

The statistics are quite general, such as referral sources. Most of my blog traffic comes from manullang.com, which means people start at my home page and then click the "stuff jen says" link. Makes sense. The next highest referral source is Google. There are others too, but I find the Google thing veddy interesting. I can see what people were searching for that led them here, and this is a selection of what I found this morning. This data is from the past 30-some days. It's easy to see how some of these searches got people to manullang.com, but there are a few head-scratchers:

• "cities without starbucks"
  
• amy krouse rosenthal's perfume
  
• "charlotte summers" porn
  
• "ever peed your pants"
  
• pirates and ships wheel in his pants
  
• can rice thrown at weddings make birds explode
  
• buy a bumper sticker "camping sucks"
  
• civil air patrol brazil
  
• civil air patrol is evil
  
• fred meyer annoying tomatoes
  
• coloring pages from leviticus - wuh huh?
  
• johnny and the sprites resume
  
• munsters potion ingredients
  
• photomama hamster
  
• pictures of zac efron pantsless - they must have been really disappointed
  
• siegfried and roid
  
• "billy corgan" lasik
  
• where is my old bullfrogs and butterflies cassette tape - great, now I have the song stuck in my head

I love the way people use Google. It makes me want to pepper my writing with odd words and phrases, just to see if it brings weirdies here.

I guess I could apologize if you got here and didn't find what you were looking for, but if you'd put quotes around your search terms you'd have better luck, dummy.