Jul. 15: Lazy post of a damn, dirty cheater

‘Member that one time, at band camp, when I shared twitters with you? I’m gonna do it again. See, I gotta get busy painting Katie’s room this morning but Loveliest Lori will wring her hands and my mom will wonder if I’m dead if I don’t post something every day, so I’m kinda cheating. While this is technically a blog post, it’s shockingly short on anything very Jen-ish. If you prefer the non-Jen type of posts, then, well, that’s just not very nice at all and maybe you should sit down on this chair that is totally not made of thumbtacks and live, angry earwigs.

On to the marvy tweets. If you’re not already aware of these twitterers, you should be. Name links go to their twitter pages where you can follow them.

thedayhascome Pressing the center of my steering wheel doesn't convey my hatred for you or your inability to navigate a motor vehicle.

Moltz I love my wife. She brought me coffee in bed. And said "This is all you're getting unless you want to suck up what I spilled on the stairs".

emilybrianna She builds perfect block towers? A wee architect! Savvy and charming? Our little politician! Well, my son just yelled at the Pacific Ocean.

wordlust In God's eyes, angels are actually real pests, or as He calls them--"zombies with wings".

thedayhascome My car horn would be more effective if it was augmented with a death ray.

gknauss The 4th of July is the best holiday: BBQ, fireworks, no in-laws, no presents, and the Declaration of Independence. Screw you, Christmas!

phillygirl Scheduling Round II of the Man v. Wasp bout. While man knocked out wasp in Round I w/Febreeze, wasp rebounded fragrantly & is ready for more.

CranberryPerson Good: I've been able to avoid dropping f-bombs in front of my kids. Bad: they gasp in shock when someone says "fudgesicles" or "fishsticks."

wordlust Dogs can teach us about following our dreams, even if we dream about rolling on the half-skeletonized corpse of a rat.

scottsimpson July 5, 1776: The Forefathers meet at Denny's and drink coffee in silence: the first Holy Shit Did We Just Do What I Think We Just Did? Day.

jkubicek Sometimes when I'm feeling particularly gangsta I hold the can sideways while I water the basil.

blaine23 Harry Potter and the Increasing Irrelevance Due To Twilight.

secretsquirrel A CV written in italicised Comic Sans? I'm sorry, sir, but we have no jobs for circus clowns here.

zuhl "Dad, may I have $2?" "No." "Why are you so mean to me?" "Because adopting you was a tragic error." "Mom!" "Won't help. She agrees with me."

wordlust Awesome word: stoutamisu. It's a dessert, it's a beer, it's an early death I'm willing to sign up for immediately.

CranberryPerson This CNN poll question "Is Obama tough enough?" is severely hindered by not having a "why don't you shut the hell up, CNN?" option.

Remiel WARNING: HUGE SPOILER. On that tiny, tiny Civic.

KatyDidSays Drove past a car with a sign on it that said "No Fat Chicks." Tried to give him the finger but somehow ended up giving a thumbs up instead.

You can count on these twitterers being clever and amusing again. And you can most certainly count on me reminding you of that. Until then—